Me Vs. Me

So close. Always so close....to getting away....letting go....forgetting. Sucked back in like a black hole....there is no escape. Strong will....he steals. A game of lust and loathing....it's a mind trip. Step carefully....I tell myself....can't slip. Put to death all emotions before they grow....keep the heart cold. Keep in mind....he'll break you down....if you stick around. Admit it....he means more to you. More than you wish him to....than you claim him to be. Your skin may be thick like leather....but inside you are lace. Why set yourself up for failure....disappointment.....heartache? All is true....but I told you...I can't....I can't escape. Something....somehow....always drags me back into his embrace. My mind is intact....I'll be fine....don't worry....just get off my back. Your mind may be tactful dear....but just remember....the brain has no voice when the heart speaks. My apologies....for being so harsh...so bold. For....I wish not to upset you. But my dear....you are falling....falling in love....with the devil....and my god....he will consume your soul. 

Foolish Reveries

Lay with me in the meadows, by the countryside.
Grace my ears with your soothing lullabies.
Read to me while I rest, encased in the warmth of your limbs.
Take me unto the tale, far from all things grim.
Entwine your fingers with mine and pull me from this darkness.
Force me to see, not all that spins outside my world is monstrous.
Eradicate the gruesome entity that has infested my mortal scraps.
Rescue me from the blood lusting wolves and their rock-strewn traps.

Sit with me in the thick smog, near the fireside.
Stare into me amorously, entrancing me with your eyes.
Articulate not a single word; allow only your heart to speak out.
Pledge not one promise; permit time to disprove my doubts.
Explore and discover every aspect of my intricate, internal self.
Hold my hand up to your chest, to sense heartbeats felt for no one else.
Reveal yourself to me entirely; hide not in the shadows of this night.
Delicately revive the thumping of my heart...out of purity...not in spite.

Take me to your elite scene of solitude, by the lakeside.
Make us lost in the grains of sand, under the lifeless sky.
Place your hand upon my face and subtle kisses upon my lips.
Brush over my skin with the lightness of your fingertips.
Toast to an eternal life lived together in truth, love, and pleasure.
Drink with me the celebratory wine, red as ruby treasures.
Forever express your love, not through idioms, but actions.
Walk with me in this fantasy and we shall find undying satisfaction.


…Hope slowly fades to ethereal illusions before my eyes.
…I'm beginning to believe your existence is merely my mind's lie.

Advocating Sin

Come here dear.
I won't say please.
Bow before me.
Beg for it...on your knees.
Pin me down now.
Push your lust inside.
Pull my hair.
Tell me your fairy tale lies.
Drag your nails down my back.
Sink your teeth into my neck.
Do it! I won't be an emotional wreck.
For, there are no emotions left.
You think I'll fall for you again?
I won't fall...I'll break you before I fall.
I'll take everything you have.
Knock you down, just to watch you crawl.
You think you can manipulate me?
Creep into my mind and fuck it?
Give it your best shot darling.
You won't get away with that shit.
You want to misuse me baby?
Don't put forth much effort...I'll allow you to.
This time around, I'm in control.
And I'm playing you for the fool. 

Whipping Boy

I stood at his front door last night.
Under the sky's silver eye.
Drenched in the cries of Heaven
My tears had room to hide.
In a time of retribution and desperation...
Swarming with disarray and no care for consequence...
Wanting no longer to be alone...
I drank my pride and knocked upon his foyer.

"My dearest Tempter, I've returned.
I submit to you now; tainted heart in bloody palm.
I am finished, I am through.
Condemned love to hell along with myself and you.
The lesson has already been taught.
I accepted the shallow waters we wade in long ago.
I ask you simply to lay me down, so that I may feel.
Feel desirable...feel alive...and most of all to know I'm still human."

A nightmare...being back there.
Never thought I'd revisit.
Misery surrounded us like starved mosquitoes
Sucking dry our bones, just for a reminiscent taste.
Scorched by his flame one too many times
Now blazing together in chorus.
Last night an intense rendezvous with Satan
Today an induction into the realm of wicked decadence.